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Take 10: Mullet Mania!

 
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Take 10: Mullet Mania
It’s the most epic Take Ten of all time as the Secret Cabal cuts a list of the great mullets in Marvel history

Posted: 2008-04-02    Updated: 2008-06-05 13:34:42


   

 
By Ben Morse

Every week, a secret cabal of Marvel staffers gathers to discuss the best of the best when it comes to the House of Ideas.

This week, the Secret Cabal pays homage to the most powerful force in the Marvel Universe: the mighty mullet.

More hard-hitting than Thor's hammer, more unyielding than Captain America's shield and an even greater fashion accessory than the Infinity Gauntlet, the mullet has defined some of Marvel's greatest heroes and villains. It has turned the tides of epic battles and shaped the destiny of the universe more than once.

On this momentous day, the Cabal undertakes its most arduous task to date as the list of truly great Marvel mullets must be culled to but 10. Despite the Herculean pressure, the Cabal soldiers on and presents a definitive list plus a special spotlight comic for each entry courtesy of Marvel Digital Comics Unlimited.

Get ready for business in the front, but a party in the back.

As always, these picks reflect the personal choices of the Secret Cabal, not the official opinion of Marvel or Marvel.com, and can be considered subjective at best. Enjoy!


10. JUSTICE
Mullet's First Appearance: NEW WARRIORS #43 (1994)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "When Vance Astrovik emerged from a stay in prison, the former Marvel Boy had become a man, and that didn't just mean a tough new code name and pink shades, it meant a hair style that screamed 'I am not foolin' around, people!' And he wasn't, not with that mullet." –Secret Cabal member Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: MARVEL UNIVERSE: THE END #1—Justice gets killed with the rest of the Avengers, likely because he cut his mullet and thus had it coming

9. STAR BRAND
Mullet's First Appearance: STAR BRAND #1 (1986)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "When Ken Connell gained the Star Brand, he became the single most powerful entity in the New Universe. Since Ken already sported a bristling blond mullet before he got his godlike abilities, he was already prepared for the level of responsibility that came with it and rewarded his coif accordingly with a killer windblown effect forever thereafter." –Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: NEWUNIVERSAL #1—A new sans-mullet Star Brand debuts; fans riot

8. DARGO KTOR
Mullet's First Appearance: THOR #384 (1987)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "The 26th Century not only has better names than we do, but their gods look about a million times cooler than those in the present day. And few accessories compliment a mullet better than spiked shoulder pads. Remember: Nothing showcases the God of Thunder's power better than a mullet." –Secret Cabal member Agent M
Spotlight Comic: THOR #364—Thor gets transformed into a frog as his 26th century counterpart laughs from afar and brushes back his glorious locks

7. NOVA
Mullet's First Appearance: Circa NEW WARRIORS #40 (1993)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "Though the bucket-shaped helmet disguised it well, make no mistake: at the height of the '90s, Rich Rider knew how to take care of his business up front and then get down to the real business of partying hard. Along with his earring and attitude, rumor has it that Nova's enviable mullet made him the hero of young Marvel.com assistant editor Ben Morse." –Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: ANNIHILATION: PROLOGUE—Without his long-abandoned mullet, Nova finds himself powerless to prevent the slaughter of the Nova Corps

6. RICK JONES
Mullet's First Appearance: Circa INCREDIBLE HULK #326 (1986)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "As the perennial coolest teenager in the Marvel Universe, Rick Jones always stood on the front line of fashion trends, so his rocking of the mullet came as no surprise. But what takes Rick's tonsorial choice to the next level of awesome was that he kept the mullet love coming when he transformed into the friggin' Hulk! Only thing cooler than a mullet? A Hulk-sized mullet!" –Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: CAPTAIN MARVEL #17—Rick Jones bonds with the alien Mar-Vell and attempts to make the kooky Kree cat hip to the concept of the mullet (off-panel)

5. VENOM
Mullet's First Appearance: Circa AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #316 (1989)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "In the freewheelin' 90's, you weren't a mainstay of the Marvel Universe if you didn't rock the mullet. Like Wolverine before him, Venom was everywhere. He could try to hide that sucker under an alien symbiote costume, but its glory shone through." –Agent M
Spotlight Comic: VENOM #1—Eddie Brock compensates for loss of mullet with plenty of tongue (get your mind out of the gutter—he literally has a super-long tongue)

4. QUASAR
Mullet's First Appearance: QUASAR #1 (1989)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "Not only did Quasar sport a mullet longer than anybody had any reasonable right to and well after it was the 'in' thing to do, he did so while keeping a reasonably high profile in the Marvel Universe. Sure the guy kinda faded into limbo after a respectable 60-issue ongoing series, but he still made fairly consistent appearances in the Avengers books and the dude got a cake made with him on it—what other mullet-bearers can say that?" –Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: FANTASTIC FOUR #552—One of Quasar's final appearances in full-mulleted glory before he marches off to his death shortly after getting a trim…coincidence? Doubtful!

3. INVISIBLE WOMAN
Mullet's First Appearance: FANTASTIC FOUR #280 (1985)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "While there's been no shortage of mullets throughout the Marvel Universe over the years, few have been worn by women. Why? Because when perfection has been achieved, there's nothing left to prove. Sue Storm, we salute you and your majestic femullet." –Agent M
Spotlight Comic: FANTASTIC FOUR #538—Reed and Sue's marriage hits the skids, likely due in large part to Mr. Fantastic's revulsion at his wife's current hairdo(n't)

2. BISHOP
Mullet's First Appearance: UNCANNY X-MEN #282 (1991)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "Traveling back in time from an oppressive future where the mullet has become a symbol of freedom and rebellion, Bishop's super-mullet also infuses the 'business in the front, party in the back' hairdo with the majestic style of the Jheri Curl. Kudos to you, Lucas Bishop. Kudos to you." –Agent M
Spotlight Comic: X-MEN: PRIME—Following a disastrous bald period during the Age of Apocalypse, Bishop returns to his rightful reality and hair style

1. LONGSHOT
Mullet's First Appearance: LONGSHOT #1 (1985)
Learn More About The Wearer… Here
Why It Makes The List: "The patron saint of mullets in the Marvel Universe has been taking care of business and partying like a rock star without interruption for 23 years and counting. Long after other mullets and empires have risen and fallen, Longshot has defied the odds—pun intended—by keeping his platinum blond trusses looking like Rick Springfield. Others may have thrown in the towel and shaved their heads, but not this extra-dimensional mutant. Longshot: we salute you." –Annihilator882
Spotlight Comic: X-MEN ANNUAL #10—Longshot joins the X-Men, mullet in tow


 
Reader Comments:
   

 
Anyone ever see the movie Ghost World? Remember the guy with the mullet at the gas station? I have often thought that he should be a super hero. My only name for him was Mullet Man though... ...
Posted By: Specterofthepast
 
What about Rachel's flaming red-head mullet in Excalibur? I'm surprised that one didn't make the list.
Posted By: neling
 
I can't believe Rachel didn't make the list either. So unfair. Rachel had to endure that mullet for years and doesn't even make Marvel's top mullet list. :P
Posted By: Rachel__Summers
 

 

 

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