Psych Ward: Moon Knight

This therapist has worked with the client, identified this time as “Steven Grant” on two previous occasions. The first was while he, birth name Marc Spector, was living as one Jake Lockley. The second, mere months ago, was after the client managed to reach out to this writer under his Spector identity, requesting services while he was institutionalized. The institution in question refused all but the most limited access to the client, making therapy nearly impossible. On top of that, there seemed to be indications of client mistreatment. After filing injunctions to have access to my client, the client escaped before any of them were even heard and I did not hear from him until now.

As has been covered extensively previously, the client admits he continues to have conversations with Khonshu, the patron god of his costumed identity and the one who evidently resurrected Spector when he was seemingly killed by his employer Bushman while both were operating as mercenaries. On issues of religion, this writer generally does not make judgments about the client’s faith up to and including their statements of godhood. This is the world we live in currently and it seems increasingly difficult to separate fact from fiction on first blush. Nonetheless, Khonshu remains a disconcerting element of the client’s life because the deity consistently suggests the client engage in dangerous and cruel activities and mocks him if he fails to fulfill those requests. Real or no, Khonshu exerts a problematic control on the client throughout his identities.

Khonshu, however, must wait, given the client’s primary stated concern at this time.

As made note of in the past, the strain of multiple identities has taken their toll on the client from time to time. Others, in the past, have misdiagnosed this as Dissociative Identity Disorder, but the client—be he calling himself Spector, Lockley, Moon Knight, or, as currently, Grant—does not fit criteria for this rare diagnosis.

All of this noted, this seems, by far, the most difficult time the client has ever experienced separating his identities from one another. Worse still, he seems to be having delusions that place his alter egos in entirely fictional settings: Spector as a warrior against werewolves on the moon, Lockley as a kind of noir tragic hero being set up for his friend Frenchie’s death. Not only is he seemingly unable to tell who he is at any given time, he also seems to be struggling with his reality testing when it comes to settings and events.

In session, Grant, as he insisted I call him, seemed exhausted and wired at once. He would zone out for periods of time and speak rapidly, almost frantically, at others. Eye contact was erratic at best and often bordering on non-existent. He seemed both desperate for help from this writer and resentful of it all at once. Keeping session on track was impossible and following his tangents did not feel much easier.

However, when faced with reception or briefly taking a phone call in the waiting room, the client seemed to be able to hold on to the moment and be “himself.” This writer’s hypothesis is that, like the child who screams and cries when his parents pick him up from a great day at daycare, Grant is barely holding back what’s happening to him when he is out in public. In the safety of the office, he was able to let himself go and what I observed was the inner turmoil running free.

Given the volatility, it seems unlikely Grant can continue to operate at this level of functioning for much longer. That coupled with his violent abilities and the “influence” of Khonshu could make him a very dangerous individual to have in public without monitoring. Unfortunately, at this time, this writer is unable to make the cause for a 48-hour hold and the client refuses to voluntarily subject himself to hospitalization, which, given his recent experience, is understandable.

For the time being, I will continue to consult with Doctors Jeff Lemire and Greg Smallwood to provide the best possible care for Marc Spector, whatever name he chooses to use at any given time. Please review our finds in file MOON KNIGHT #11 on February 1.

Psy D. Candidate Tim Stevens is an Outpatient Therapist used to lunch with Khonshu. Guy gets a bad rap.